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By
WAYNE KLEIN
Baby pictures. You know the
ones where you're going pee for the first time
standing up (if you're a guy that is) or sitting
on the potty for the first time smiling like an
idiot at the camera. These are the ones your
mother brings out when you introduce your first
serious girlfriend/boyfriend or announce you're
getting engaged. It's some damn American
rite-of-passage like puberty. Only puberty passes
on after your voice grows deeper. Eventually you
stop growing hair in the most unlikely places (for
a little while anyway). But those embarrassing
baby pictures last forever. Forever.
"The Man with One Red Shoe" is Tom Hanks'
embarrassing baby picture. Every time he thinks
he's made great dramatic strides, someone will
take it upon themselves to release it or show it
on TV or mention in passing. Hanks probably wants
to bury himself alive when that happens. I can't
blame him. I would, too.
Stan Dragoti had a singular sense as a director.
He turned everything he directed into crap. I'm
not sure if even Hitchcock could have salvaged
this one, not with a script as painfully bad as
this one. Based on an inexplicably popular French,
"The Tall Man with One Black Shoe," it must have
lost something in the translation or maybe
American's have a thing for red shoes.
"The Man with One Red Shoe" will leave you wincing
and pushing the DVD fast forward button. You'll
find excuses to drop things between the seat
cushions just so you can dive into them and hide.
Hanks plays a concert violinist who is mistaken by
the CIA as a mole within their organization
because he's wearing mismatched shoes. Didn't it
ever occur to them that he might be colorblind?
Edward Herrmann, Charles Durning and Dabney
Coleman obviously had mortgages to pay because
they play the secret agents trying to nab Hanks.
Jim Belushi makes the first of many appearances he
probably wishes he could forget as Hanks' best
friend. Carrie Fisher pops in as Belushi's wife
who has the hots for Hanks. Hanks just wants to
get the hell out of this movie. You can tell he's
already dreaming of "Big" or "Forest Gump." It's
in his eyes. Oh, it also has Lori Singer. Maybe
this is the film that sidetracked her career.
Somebody wasted a lot of effort here. "The Man
with One Red Shoe" looks pretty darn good on DVD.
Boy, that red shoe looks mighty bright. Jeez
Louise, that sky sure looks blue. Is that a tall
blond man with a black shoe in the background? Oh,
sorry must be a digital blemish. If you liked this
film, you'll love the DVD since the picture
quality is crisp and although a little bit soft
occasionally the image is mostly sharp. The stereo
sound has pretty good presence although the
dialogue was muffled in a couple of scenes. There
are no extras on this disc. Maybe they were
waiting for the other shoe to drop. There's also
no commentary track. What's Stan Dragoti going to
say? What an accomplishment this was? Everyone
would know he was lying.
"The Man with One Red Shoe" runs around with its
shoelaces untied. The result is a comedy that
looks amazingly stupid and trips over its own feet
for 90 minutes. |
